All week I’ll be posting clips from Smarkus and Company, and educational cartoon/live-action/technological nightmare sent to me by my man in the field, Junkstore Jesse T.
Let me set the scene: a mankind-hating blip creature appears one day inside these kids’ computer—which is a hybrid of an Apple II, Radio Shack TRS-80 and a small lawnmower engine. If you were a kid, and an 8-bit genie appeared promising to tell you about the secrets of the universe (or, in this case “How do blind people play baseball?” asks the slackjawed girl. Dumbass.), you would probably be pretty excited. Not this kid who, upon realizing Wikipedia is in excess of 10 years away, would rather just have the goddamned information he’s looking for than go on an adventure. This boy’s response is one of my all-time favorites. Bite me, Smarkus.
How does Huey Lewis and the News factor into all this? Click More to find out!
Mindy O’Toole, the slack-jawed girl who asked about blind people instead of 1000 more wishes, appeared in the Huey Lewis video for “If This is It.” Check out 00:53 seconds in…she’s the girl on the bed that says “Hey! Huey Lewis is calling from a payphone on the beach!” and then hangs up on him. What a little donkey.
Ok…ready to feel like an asshole now? That little girl you just laughed at accidentally drowned in a bathtub in 2005. If she had only asked Smarkus what a drainplug is…
More on the rest of the Smarkus gang’s untimely deaths, and Craig T. Nelson’s thoughts on the so-called “Smarkus Curse,” tomorrow!
Ya know, I just knew this Smarkus video was gonna be loaded with gems, but Craig T. Nelson? Shit yes! Can’t wait to see more…
Comment by Junkstore — January 14, 2009 @ 10:23 am
Remind me not to invite the News to my beach party. Annette Funicello they are not!
Comment by admin — January 14, 2009 @ 1:18 pm
Jebus — you spackled a smile on my face and then sledgehammered it off.
Rhyming genies from computers that run on cassette will never bring me joy again.
Comment by Brendan McGinley — January 14, 2009 @ 4:01 pm
[...] and Co., in which Smarkus shows his utter contempt for brillo headed boys, yelly and shrill (and someday-to-drown-in-a-bathtub-accident) girls and, generally, all of [...]
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