The day after Easter is a special day: Jesus slashes prices on candy nationwide, and the remaining Marshmallow Peeps are returned to their families, spared a grisly microwave death and granted book deals to tell their amazing, harrowing tale of survival.

It’s also a day to reflect on some of the worst web cartoons I’ve ever seen, as people jump on the Easter bandwagon leading up to the big day. The last cartoon–and the most screwed-up idea I’ve ever seen–appear last because they are NSFW. That means Not Safe For Work, for those of you who actually work. Unless you work at the “talking breast ‘toon center,” then you should be fine.

1. Spanish Easter Bunny is in the Clink

I don’t speak Spanish, and neither do you, so let me translate this masterpiece. “Easter Day” is like America’s “Easter” except the Spaniards (is that politically correct? I’m sure it is. Why bother asking anyone) add the word “Day” to the end to differentiate it from “Dia de Los Easter,” which is in late October, translated as “Night of the Lepus.”

The story is this: In Germany, pink, penis-nosed rabbits invented the “terrifying shout into the computer microphone.” They are then hit by cabs, a holiday tradition. The steal eggs from Snowy Owls. The mole police arrive, speaking English (as they do), fart, declare “Don’t Make Hasty Decision” and worship their savior Luis Villafane Pinto.

2. Easter “Cartoon.”

Here’s a fun game, how many seconds of this video will you watch before you realize the creator has no idea what a “cartooon” is? Have fun.

3. “Hip Hop Easter Bunny”

There aren’t many things I hate more than “raps.” No, I’m not talking about rap. I’m talking about “raps.” Whether it’s a ironic ad campaign, a Looney Tunes ’90s revival marketing strategy, an old white lady being a “fish out of water” in a Chris Rock movie…I’d rather hear Clint Eastwood sing than see anything like this ever again. I don’t know who this humor is for. Toss in some of the worst 3D animation on the planet, and you’ve got a winner.

Plus, these assholes rhyme “basket” with “mascot,” which is not quite as annoying as when that country singer rhymed “Bin Laden” with “have you forgotten.” But it’s close.

OK. This is what you’ve been waiting for. The worst Easter Video, possibly the worst thing I’ve ever seen, is after the jump. Not safe for work, you’ve been warned. Not safe for the Unemployed either, as it will lead to a depressing shame spiral.

4. Hare Boobs

I can’t decide what’s more terrible about this video, so I’ll break it down:

1. The punchline is that these are boobs, and we’re supposed to be too stupid to figure that out until the end in spite of the half-hearted whistling, WomanSavers Advertisement, “Overy swollen and sain-sa-tive” jokes and boob-shaped rabbit head with nipple nose. Here’s the one guy this revalation worked on. Congrats.

2. The naked Asian Bratz doll has breasts that speak in Southern accents. I’m positive Tom Petty wrote a song about that. I got my own boobs for talkin’/and areola mouths for fun/my funbags have Southern Accents/where I come from.

3. “Have you been doing more Hare-obics?” Yep, now we have a boob manifested as a talking rabbit who makes bad puns. Why stop there? “Do your boobs have HARE on them?” “Is there a stray HARE that needs tweezed off your boob?”

4. The thought, the very visual, of a boob-rabbit eating chocolate is….it’s….it’s the most disturbing thing I can think of. God god man, where does the chocolate go?!? Does each boob rabbit have it’s own boob-stomach and boob-digestive system, or is it incorporated into the larger woman whose cursed frame has given birth to anthropomorphic tit-creatures? A larger discussion is at hand.

Happy Easter, every one of us.